It's so hard to believe it has been 6 years since the last time I talked with you. Six years since your last bit of advice. Six years since called me out for not standing up straight. I miss it. I miss you. While time has healed a little, it has by no means stitched up the wound to where there's no scar. It's still there. It hurts often. It hurts more often now that I live alone and am not in constant camaraderie with others. It hurts especially hard now that I can't go visit for the first time in 6 years. It was always our little secret. I would sneak away from life for a few hours, bring you a purple orchid, and sit and tell you about life.
Life is good. Life is busy, but that's the way I prefer it. I work with people that I love, and serve the Lord in my job. I know you would be proud of the ways things have turned out. I hate that you didn't get to see my high school or college graduation. That you never saw me play basketball in college. I know you would have been so excited when I signed to play. You were always my biggest fan and toughest critic. One of the many things I got from you is you honesty. My friends can attest to that! But I also got your sincerity. I pray that people know how much I care just by the words I say. That they can hear my heart. That was one of the things I loved about you.
Another thing I loved was your wealth of knowledge. I was enthralled by your stories of our family. You always shared my passion for Appalachian history. I miss so badly how you could connect me to almost any person in the room through our family tree. I mean, we are from East TN, right?! Everyone's related.
All the above is just my own heartache and selfishness, because I know that you are doing great. The best you can be, actually. I mean, you're with the Lord!!! Hello! That's be best it can get! I love you and miss you incredibly. I can only hope I'm making you proud.
Jessica
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| Before my 8th grade prom. I'm her look-alike. |
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| All the grandkids about 4 years ago. |
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